Comfort From Huggery

Never I thought before about its effects in making people more comfortable and relaxing. It was a month ago when I was in the ICU and I was feeling the pain after the operation that time. A female medical assistant staff told me a useful tip about how to make myself feel less pain and in the same time feel more comfortable when bed-riden for a long time. She took a small pillow for me and and ask me to hug the pillow. That time, I was thinking “The surgery was done on my chest yet you ask me to put something in front of it and pressurize it?! What on Earth was it suppose to ease my pain?”.

She told me to imagine that I was hugging my family members or loved one in order to make it more real. Ya, I was feeling less painful and more comfortable after that. Finally I know what she intended to deliver to me. When we hugged someone, we will feel more comfort and warm thus it will divert our mind which was thinking about the pain to another things in front of us.

I continued to use the same tactic when I was in pain where I am recuperating in my home currently. I just hope I can get well as soon as possible and back to action again.

Thanks again to all my family members and friends.

Wishing You Were There & Brotherly Convo Year

Hmm… 2009… This year supposed to be the year where we all going to have our convocation either for diploma or degree. Hey man, guess what, “you” supposed to be the 1st person in the family that will be going to convocation this year on the month of May. I’m sure “you” will have the bragging right in the family if “you” were still here back then.

Today we having a photographing section for our brother who will be attending his convocation this Sunday. From my observation, it seems to be everyone are not fully happy with with it as we were thinking of “you” that time. This wasn’t supposed to be the first time we going to have a family member who will be attending convocation. When the photographer ask us to smile, it seems to be our sister can’t smile as usual. I guess everyone of us were just showing our teeth in front of the camera without enjoying the smile of the photographing session.

When I was viewing some of “your” friends who were posting their pictures of convocation last May, I was feeling sorrow about what happened to “you” earlier this year. I’m sure “you” can be there as well, up there taking scroll of graduation to show what have “you” done for the past 2 years. Wish we could take many pictures of “your” convocation that time.

Anyway, hope that we can have a good time this Sunday for our brother’s convocation. I’m hope that we can have a better smile in front of the camera instead of just showing teeth to the cameraman. Prayed that “you” will be smiling up there as well while “watching” us on that day. Bless our day, budak…

Fish Leong 梁靜茹 – 會呼吸的痛

在东京铁塔　第一次眺望
zai dong jing tie ta, di yi ci tiao wang
Gazing afar for the first time from Tokyo Tower

看灯火模仿　坠落的星光
kan deng huo mo fang, zhui luo de xing guang
Looking at those lights imitating the fallen star

我终於到达　但却更悲伤
wo zhong yu dao da, dan que geng bei shang
I’ve finally arrived but more depressed

一个人完成　我们的梦想
yi ge ren wan cheng, wo men de meng xiang
Accomplishing our dream alone

你总说　时间还很多　你可以等我
ni zong shuo, shi jian hai hen duo, ni ke yi deng wo
As you said, there’s still a lot of times, you can wait for me

以前我不懂得　未必明天　就有以后
yi qian wo bu dong de, wei bi ming tian jiu you yi hou
I didn’t understand it last time, tomorrow doesn’t mean there’s future

想念是会呼吸的痛　它活在我身上所有角落
xiang nian shi hui hu xi de tong, ta huo zai wo shen shang suo you jiao luo
Missing you is like the pain of breathing, it lives on every corner of my body

哼你爱的歌会痛　看你的信会痛　连沉默也痛
heng ni ai de ge hui tong, kan ni de xin hui tong, lian cheng mo ye tong
It’s hurts by humming the song you loved, it’s hurts by looking at your letters, even the silence hurts

遗憾是会呼吸的痛　它流在血液中来回滚动
yi han shi hui hu xi de tong, ta liu zai xie yi zhong lai hui gun dong
Sorrow is the pain of breathing, it flows back and forth within my blood

后悔不贴心会痛　恨不懂你会痛　想见不能见最痛
hou hui bu tie xin hui tong, hen bu dong ni hui tong ,xiang jian bu neng jian zui tong
It’s hurt by regretting for not caring enough, it’s hurt by understanding you not enough, it’s hurt most when unable to see you

没看你脸上　张扬过哀伤
mei kan ni lian shang, zhang yang guo ai shang
Can’t see any sadness on your face

那是种多么　寂寞的倔强
na shi zhong duo me, ji mo de jue jiang
That’s such a lonely stubbornness

你拆了城墙　让我去流浪
ni chai le cheng qiang, rang wo qu liu lang
You had tear down the wall, and let me wander aimlessly

在原地等我　把自己捆绑
zai yuan di deng wo, ba zi ji kun bang
so I truss up myself in a place

你没说　你也会软弱　需要依赖我
ni mei shuo, ni ye hui ran ruo, xu yao yi lai wo
You doesn’t say that you might become weak too as you need my support

我就装不晓得　自由移动　自我地过
wo jiu zhuang bu xiao de, zi you yi dong zi wo de guo
So I pretended that I doesn’t know, moving freely and live my own life

我发誓不再说谎了　多爱你就会抱你多紧的
wo fa shi bu zai shuo huang le, duo ai ni jiu hui bao ni duo jin de
I promise I won’t lie any more, how tight I hold you means how much I love you

我的微笑都假了　灵魂像飘浮著　你在就好了
wo de wei xiao dou jia le, ling hun xiang piao fu zhe, ni zai jiu hao le
My smile are fake, my soul seems to be just floating, it’ll be nice if you’re here

我发誓不让你等候　陪你做想做的无论什么
wo fa shi bu rang ni deng hou, pei ni xiang zuo de wu lun shen me
I promise I won’t let you wait, I’ll be with you for whatever you want to do

我越来越像贝壳　怕心被人触碰　你回来那就好了
wo yue lai yue xiang bei ke, pa xin bei ren chu peng ,ni hui lai na jiu hao le
I’m more and more like a shell, afraid of being touched by others, it’ll be nice if you’re back

能重来那就好了
neng chong lai na jiu hao le
it’ll be nice if everything can just start over

Fish Leong 梁靜茹 – 接受

彷佛上一分钟
fang fu shang yi fen zhong
你还陪在我左右
ni hai pei zai wo zuo you
还以为我们会毓花结果
hai yi wei wo men hui kai hua jie guo
我还记得玫瑰色天空
wo hai ji de mei kui se tian kong
却模糊了我们的脸孔
que mo hu le wo men de lian kong
哼过的歌到底有什麽内容
hng guo de ge dao di you shen me nei rong

彷佛已经自由
fang fu yi jing zi you
下一刻我变成风
xia yi ke wo bian cheng feng
吹过你的领空
chui guo ni de ling kong
差点失控
cha dian shi kong
回忆在夜里闹得很凶
hui yi de ye li nao de hen xiong
我想我可以明白你所有的痛
wo xiang wo ke yi ming bai ni suo you de tong
想让你知道我懂
xiang rang ni zhi dao wo dong
却担心言不由衷
que dan xin yan bu you zhong

我们都接受
wo men dou jie shou
一定是彼此不够成熟
yi ding shi bi ci bu gao cheng shou
在爱情里分不了轻重
zai ai qing yi fen bu liao qing zhong
诚实得过了头
cheng shi de guo le tou
不能退後也无法向前走
bu neng tui houy ye wu fa xiang qian zou
爱是一个自私的念头
ai shi yi ge zi si de nian tou
把寂寞消除的理由
ba ji mo xiao chu de li you
剩下的那些感动
sheng xia de na xie gan dong
能记得多久
neng ji de duo jiu

The Operation Room – Part 3

Another trip to the room again on last Monday. I can’t remember much about what happened a few minutes before being undergo operation that day. I went inside the room in the afternoon that day and I can only remembered that my eyes were looking around the room to see exactly what it looks like this time around. Then the anesthetist told me that it is time for me to sleep. The moment I begun to feel anything from sound to light, I was laying in the bed in the ICU. That time I can felt the medical assistants on duty were trying to insert a few pipe into my lungs, stomach and mouth. Anyway thanks for them for taking care of me for 1 whole day.

After I was declared stable, I was transferred to the normal patients’ ward with all those pipes removed. At there, I was resting a few more days before, the doctors allowed me to discharge from the hospital. Thanks to those who were with me most of the time during my stay at the hospital especially my mom and bro. Not to forget those who came far to visit me as well.

PS: No need to write the details of the operation huh? Become iceman for 2 hours…

The Operation Room – Part 2

Really long time didn’t entered the room after all. 18 years ago is the last time. That Wednesday, I was scheduled to undergo the same procedure again. I really forget what kind of feeling it was when given anesthetic into the body. When entering the operation room, I didn’t look around the room much as I was staring up only. I was greeted by the anesthetist and had a few chat with him. He told me that he too was involved in the same operation 18 years ago. After that, he gave me a few shots of injection and told me to breath deeply. I guess the effect of the anesthetics were too good. I feel asleep after a few seconds. The moment I wake up, I didn’t realized that it was already past 1 and half hour and the operation was over.

Got some bad new later that night as the doctors told me that the operation wasn’t a successful one as the method failed to do anything good to me. That’s mean there will be another trip to the room again and it will be next Monday and that one will be much bigger that this. OMG… On Thursday, I received a few visitation from my colleagues in the evening. I was glad to see them again. Thanks for the card as well. Hope I can get well soon and back to action again. HAHA…

Before I ended this part, I would like to thanks all who accompany me either physically or mentally in getting through those times. Hope can see you all again after Monday! Peace…

PS: So there will be part 3 lo instead of scheduled 2 parts… HAHA…

The Operation Room – Part 1

As the title stated; yup, I will be heading to the “room” again this week after 18 years. Don’t know what will happened after that. Hope I still can write the part 2 of the blog later after the operation. I got a few requests before I will going into the room this Wednesday. I hope I can play Gundams again after that. I hope I can meet my family members, friends, and my colleagues again after that night. Ya I hope a lot, huh? At least I hope everything will be going to be fine that very moments.

Here I want apologize to my friend if I seems make a fool out of you. Maybe I didn’t realize it but I really didn’t have any intention to make any mockery from your past misery. I also want to thanks my another friend who still reading my blog these days. I hope I can still talk with you more in the future.

Finally, I thanks all people who wished me good luck for this Wednesday. I guess this year July will be another month to be remembered. Hope I can write the 2nd part of this entry this weekend.

Have a nice day you all. Peace!!!